I think this post is much more for me than for any of you.
I need to spend a little blog-space on my little one.
One month ago I said good-bye to Buddy. And I know lots of you loved him and didn't get the chance to say good-bye to him so I wanted to make a place to do that out here in cyber space.
To those of you that have expressed your sympathy to our family, thank you. It means so very much. For anyone who is not up to speed I'll catch you up.
One fall day several years back after carefully looking for months my mom found a stinky dog with a sweet face at Kay's Animal Shelter in Arlington Heights, IL. [Plug for this great no kill shelter!]
After some TLC he started smelling and looking a little better and the G family fell madly in love with Buddy. Well, most of the G family. He & dad always had their differences and I was skeptical at first. I was a too cool for school college kid that didn't feel connected to him since I wasn't living at home.
Fast forward to mom and dad's move to Georgia and you will catch a glimpse of a very worried Buddy in the front seat of the big moving truck headed out with dad for the long drive to the south.
A few weeks later we all rendezvoused at the new house in Guyton & Buddy was really starting to love his new digs. A big yard, some friendly neighbor dogs, a few cats to chase and warm weather. Drew sneaking him table scraps. Piano kids coming in and out every afternoon and naps under the piano bench while mom taught many children to play "Scarborough Fair." Life was good.
Now remember those differences between Buddy & dad? Well, the differences were growing or the tolerances were shrinking or maybe it was a little of both. It was decided that this was just not quite working out.
At the same time in the Windy City, I was living in a spacious but dungeon-y apartment with Ashley and talk of missing our family dogs was a regular topic. But we lived in a no dog type of dungeon-y apartment so we hadn't fallen victim to any Petsmart adoption days just yet.
But it would be nice to have one for cuddling with and to protect us from invaders. And hey, maybe I'd actually exercise.
[Insert light bulb idea here]
I'm pretty good at figuring out a way to get things I want. So, I asked our landlord and we came up with an agreement that would give me a chance at having a dog if I met certain conditions.
Everyone in the G family agreed that this was an ideal situation. Buddy would still be in the family, but dad would actually be able to watch Wheel of Fortune without getting barked at incessantly. This might just work out.
And work out it did. Just splendidly. Buddy was a HIT in the big city. He thrived at the park, being friendly to all he encountered on long walks and beach days. One of the conditions of the landlord agreement was that I couldn't leave him alone all day, either have a dog walker or do doggy day care or something. My then friend, now husband, Adam was a student with free time on his hands and needed some extra cash so Buddy & Adam & Jasmine got acquainted long before we became a blended family. Adam's favorite memories of these days are when Buddy would just sit down in the middle of the street on a walk and refuse to cross. Stubborn he was. Maybe that's why we got along so well.
Buddy even got accustomed to a soft-sided carrier and we started going everywhere together. He came to work with me every day for years. We flew all over the country escaping the pet travel fee and airline regulations with my sneakiness and his perfectly still and quiet traveling.
Buddy went home with me on Thanksgiving and spent his holidays at mom and dad's house until we would jet back to the city in time to ring in the New Year.
Eventually, I moved into a new apartment and Buddy was my only roomie. We decorated together (he laid in the middle of my projects), we did laundry together (he laid in the middle of my clean clothes), we went to Starbucks together (he just wanted water), we watched lots of Seinfeld on DVD when we didn't have cable (he sometimes turned the tv off when he laid on the remote), we cooked together (he laid on my feet while I made dinner). You get the idea.
Inseparable.
He spent a long time at mom and dad's house over the wedding time and I'm so glad they got that time with him. When he came back to the city we had two new roommates and he shared his pad with Jasmine & gave up his side of the bed for Adam. Life changed a little, but it was so good.
Buddy was not without health problems at any time. He was HIGH maintenance. There were the expected things like ear infections and getting sick from eating garbage or sidewalk food (not like from a vendor, the kind that was dropped on the sidewalk days ago). And then there were the surprises, food allergies, the lip fold infection, the calcified disc in his neck, and the many unexplained. I jumped through many a hoop for his health and happiness. I cooked for him, bought prescription food, cleaned ears and lips and paws. We were regulars in the vets office. But he always sprung back to his care-free self until this last spell.
I really believe that God gave us dogs to keep us company, to give us physical comfort, and to bring us joy. Buddy did all that and more. I also believe that Buddy wanted to please me and he hid his pain and discomfort until he could stand it no longer. I think Buddy knew on some level that it was okay to leave me. I was safe and protected, I was comforted and cared for, and I was living in the joyful bliss of my new marriage.
You see, dogs aren't meant to be our lifelong companions. They only live a fraction of our lives. But that doesn't make it easy to let them go. It's a lesson is selflessness and compassion to let them go. It prepares you for other hard choices that will inevitably be down the road. It helps you love your real lifelong companion a little deeper. It made me wonder if I could ever love another animal the same way I loved Buddy, but my wonderful husband assures me that he doesn't think I have a love capacity and that I will love animals, and future babies, and strangers, and friends and family.
But mostly, I miss the sound of Buddy's bark when I watch Law & Order and they do the doink-doink, or the warmth of his face on my feet when I make a pie, and the way he scratched the side of the bed in the middle of the night until I scooted over enough for him to jump up. And sometimes how I would get somewhere and realize I had a little slobber on my sleeve. And so many more things about that sweet dog.
I could go on and on. And if you are a person I see regularly I probably will.
Thanks for loving Buddy and thanks for loving me. So many people have been so kind and understanding through this process and I am so grateful.
Although he hated the camera I managed to snap quite a few pics of his grouchy mug.
In loving memory of my Buddy.
